I'd like to believe that most of us find solace in the thought that our exes pretty much die after we're done with them. Not literally die. More like, falls off the face of the earth and fails to exist anymore "die". Theyre dead to you...or a part of you. There's a sort of comfort that accompanies the thought of someone you onced cared so much about (or maybe not as much as you should've) suddenly *POOF* disappearing to their own devices on some alternate side of the planet while you live your life as if nothing ever happened and those months-years weren't spent on someone who ended up not being worth your time. It's almost crazy to think of people you once saw 24/7 living a normal, functioning life without you. In the deep recesses of your mind, you know this to be true. Because, when you see them or hear them up to their old ways (or embarking on a new journey), you wonder: 1)how are they even doing that right now? 2) why are they not in a hole somewhere 3) when did they get cleared to roam the streets again? and 4) what the heck!? Is this safe for the innocent lives of unsuspecting whores he's sure to take part in? It's much nicer to think of our "mistakes" in one context only: not thinking of them at all. If anything, most girls imagine he's off somewhere stewing in his own karma, it being more of a bitch to him then you ever were, him hopefully evaluating all the mistakes he's made and changing...maybe even apologizing or wanting you back once he's changed. But in reality? This BARELY AND RARELY happens. So when you find out that he's functioning, especially if it's quite well, you're ears are burning and you're silently wondering why the angel gets 0 and the demon dude gets 1. You may even still be harping on the feelings you thought you buried with the relationship. Once he resurfaces (especially if it's an intrusive way), your anger or other self-detrimental feelings, resurface as well. And congrats, you're now more emotionally involved than you wished to be. And to think, that bastard already drained your emotion-bank before; who would've known there were a few pennies left to throw into the well of woe?
When you break up with someone, whether you like it or not, you become like a snake moulting. You begin to shed layer after layer of who you once were. Either this takes you through a path of rediscovery, self-awareness, or independence and freedom...or you reveal yourself to be a very obsessed and needy individual (even more so than you were in the relationship). You are not and will never be that person you were with them again. You may show someone else love to the extent you once showed your previous flame love, but you can never be that same lover you once were. And it's appropriate because every different person brings out a different version of you and a different side of you. Imagine bringing the same...you...to every relationship and encounter. Damaged and carrying past burdens. It's just not healthy and not fair to a potentially great individual who knows not to eff up.
When you break up with someone, whether you like it or not, you become like a snake moulting. You begin to shed layer after layer of who you once were. Either this takes you through a path of rediscovery, self-awareness, or independence and freedom...or you reveal yourself to be a very obsessed and needy individual (even more so than you were in the relationship). You are not and will never be that person you were with them again. You may show someone else love to the extent you once showed your previous flame love, but you can never be that same lover you once were. And it's appropriate because every different person brings out a different version of you and a different side of you. Imagine bringing the same...you...to every relationship and encounter. Damaged and carrying past burdens. It's just not healthy and not fair to a potentially great individual who knows not to eff up.